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| | Cop VS Lawyer | | | Saturday, April 5, 2008 (7:08 PM)
(I'm feeling crazy) | | A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a New York City cop. He thinks that he is smarter than the cop because he is a lawyer and is certain that he has a better education then any cop. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the cop's expense.
The cop says," License and registration, please."
"What for?" says the lawyer.
The cop says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign."
Then the lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."
"You still didn't come to a complete stop, Says the cop. License and registration, please."
The lawyer says, "What's the difference?"
"The difference is you have to come to complete stop, that's the law. License and registration, please!" the cop says.
Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my license and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket."
"That sounds fair. Please exit your vehicle, sir," the cop says.
At this point, the cop takes out his night stick and starts beating the ever-loving shit out of the lawyer and says, "Do you want me to stop, or just slow down?"
| | | 25 Views | 0  Thumbs Up | 0 Comments |  |
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| | An Irish Farmer | | | Saturday, April 5, 2008 (7:07 PM)
(I'm feeling crazy) | | An Irish farmer walking through his field, notices a man drinking out of a pond.
The Irish farmer shouted: "Paid a yfed a dwr, maer gwerthin wedi cachu un a for."
Which in Gaelic means: "Don't drink the water; the cows have shit in it."
The man shouts back: "I'm a Muslim, I don't understand. Please speak in English."
The Irish farmer says: "Use two hands, it holds more"!!!
| | | | 37 Views | 0 Thumbs Up | 0 Comments | |
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| | The Federal Rebate Program | | | Saturday, April 5, 2008 (7:05 PM)
(I'm feeling crazy) | | As you may have heard, the Bush Administration said each and every one
of us would now get a nice $600 rebate.
If we spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China.
If we spend it on gasoline it will all go to the Arabs.
If we purchase a computer it will all go to India.
If we purchase fruit and vegetables it will all go to Mexico,
Honduras and Guatemala.
If we purchase a good car it will all go to Japan.
If we purchase useless crap it will all go toTaiwan and none of it
will help the American economy.
We need to keep that money here in America, so the only way to keep
that money here at home is to buy beer and prostitutes, since those
are the only businesses still in the U.S.
| | | | 53 Views | 0 Thumbs Up | 0 Comments | |
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